I am slowly realising the huge strength inside of me. Strength that others saw but I just couldn’t, for so long. Therapists, friends, psychotherapists, partners, and my family all saw a strength in me I was blind to, so blind that when anyone pointed it out I thought they were just being nice!
But as I reflect back on my life and all the obstacles and hurdles I’ve overcome to be where I am today I am beginning to feel very proud.
Not proud in a boastful way but in a quiet, more confident and determined way.
In all honesty other than my partner, 3 family members, 2 friends and this blog (where I am almost completely unknown) nobody knows anything about me. I am fiercely private in my everyday life and choose not to openly share the details of my journey with people….yet. No one except my partner even knows about this blog as I am afraid of everyone’s reaction to my truth.
I can feel in my bones that God is shining a spot light on me right now and showing me parts of myself I never truly realised I had before. I feel a sudden strength and boldness rising up in me that I haven’t felt in years. Things that have held me down for so long are beginning to fall away and I feel strong again. Strong like I did as a child where no matter what happened to me I was determined that no one could ‘beat’ me and that one day my pain and struggles would be behind me.
I believed in myself so much back then, even when I began believing the lies spoken over me I still knew I deserved better and would find it one day.
One thing I am grateful for in my character is: I do not settle.
Right now, God is really reminding me of all this and it’s incredible! Although I still feel the struggles of life and worry like everyone else about being loved and accepted I suddenly feel so powerful in myself I know, if I’m not accepted or loved, yes it will hurt because I’m human but that I will be ok because God fully loves and accepts the daughter he chose! And he is showing me this more and more on this journey with him.
I challenge you today, ask God to shine a light on the strengths in your character he has given you. The tools he equipped you with in this life when he created you and to bring them out of you more and more.
I promise you won’t regret it.